It’s a well-known fact — or, at least, a well-known Megan Fox quote — that everyone in Hollywood does drugs. Hard drugs, soft drugs, designer drugs, love drugs — all flow freely at fashionable Brentwood boites. It’s constant, prevalent and — this is key — completely hush-hush. In fact, the only people who probably aren’t high this very minute are the actors who are out talking about it in the first place. Case in point: This month two squeaky clean young thespians made waves for admitting sudsy, substance-abusing pasts. First was secretly-not-young Glee jock Cory Monteith, who, in an interview with noted muck-raking rag Parade, practically drew track marks on his arm with a crayon, so desperate was he for street cred. “I was out of control,” he insisted, before going on to describe a youth full of “skipping school, drinking, and smoking marijuana” which, when last we checked, was also known as “youth.” Not one to be outdone, professional wizard Daniel Radcliffe went even further this week in a chat with British GQ, claiming he “became reliant” on alcohol to “enjoy stuff.” (Seriously? That’s a problem now? C’mon, England! You used to be better than this! The corpse of Richard Burton just drained a growler of stout in the time it took me to type this sentence!)

Posted at 3:30 PM