It's hard out there for a Coldplay hater these days. Which isn't to say they've silenced any critics by reinventing their bland sound or public image. It's just that they've been boring for so long — they release their fifth album, Mylo Xyloto, next month #&8212; that criticizing them for said boringness just feels like old hat. So here comes their new mawkish single, "Paradise," featuring lush strings, the quickie revival of the phrase “every teardrop is a waterfall,” and some seriously ambiguous optimism. This isn’t the newly announced track with Rihanna, by the way. That’s “Princess of China,” and it’s not out yet. If that one turns out to have a fake patois and Prince-indebted production from The-Dream, forget everything we just said.