If you told the 14-year-old me, having just listened to the newly released OU812 for the ten-thousandth time, that in the year 2012 Van Halen would not only be putting out an album, but reuniting with David Lee Roth (in fulfillment of the Scriptures), well, he probably wouldn't have heard you because he'd be practicing the intro to "Hot for Teacher" on his black Kramer with the Floyd Rose tremolo. But if you angrily yanked the cord from his Marshall mini-stack and said, "Dude, LISTEN TO ME: In 24 years DLR is getting back with Eddie and Alex, and Sammy's a premium-tequila mogul!" well, then you'd have his attention. (Though halfway through that sentence he'd already be trying, and failing, to stick the landing on the last hammer-on run. It's a bitch.) So it seems appropriate to hop in the time machine, knock the guitar out of his hands, and demand that he provide a running diary of "Tattoo," the first video released from the reunited VH's upcoming album.