Bill Simmons: "All right, Ashford — wait, which one are you? Simpson, sorry. OK, we're gonna start the fake rain and have Simpson start singing. Ashford, you run into the tunnel and sing your part, but make it seem like you're about to murder Simpson. Simpson, I want you to briefly seem scared like you're about to be brutally assaulted. Then, I want it to seem like there was an inexplicable shift and suddenly you're about to do the nasty right in this tunnel. Ashford, if you get a boner or discharge anything, don't worry, we can edit around it. Be as creepy as possible. Be super-duper creepy. Dry hump Simpson's hip like you mean it. From there, the bicycle guy is going to pedal by for no reason whatsoever — that's the cue for the tough mugger guys to walk toward you and look like they're going to murder both of you, so seem a little distracted as you're singing, OK? But then we'll just have them be your backup band for the chorus because that totally makes sense. Then we'll bring in more and more people, including a deliriously happy drummer, and it's just gonna get weirder and weirder. Background people, make sure you dance with no rhythm whatsoever. And Ashford and Simpson, don't be afraid to put your arms around complete strangers as you're singing. Remember, you guys are solid as rock. All right, let's shoot this. Quiet on the set "