There is plenty of time to discuss Lil B's mystique, but first I have to address his shoes. See, Lil B has worn the same pair of Vans for too many years, and as such, his Vans have an impossible patina, like shoes you’d find on a rescue mission airboating through the Everglades. The toe box (or lack thereof) is barely holding onto its integrity. The outer canvas fabric has long since worn away, leaving only a thin strip of the inner fabric to maintain the guise of close-toed shoes. It’s truly a modern marvel. The Bay Area rapper has famously said he won’t stop wearing the shoes until he makes a million dollars. Lil B is nothing if not committed. And his unwavering conviction over the years, along with his quest to share his convictions with anyone willing to listen, is how he was able to command a legion of passionate followers to the Observatory, a quaint theater tucked inside an industrial park in Santa Ana, California.
Joey Bada$$ is a guy famed for his ability to rap really, really well. Lil B is, you know, not that. And yet this beef was over as soon as Based God rhymed the words "And if you really think you a badass" with "I turn you into trash you little bitch."
Brandon is a 23-year-old Berkeley, California, native. While not yet his full-time job, one of his greatest passions is the sport of basketball. This past Sunday, Brandon joined a crew of hopefuls attempting to secure a spot on the newly created Santa Cruz Warriors, a team within the NBA's Development League.
Editor's note: This week, some guy named Benjamin Walker joins a long, distinguished line of cinematic presidents in Timur Bekmambetov's new historical drama Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter. Here are some of our other favorite fictional POTUSes from film and TV. (If you don't see the videos, please try another browser. We put them in, we promise.)
Jeff Bridges, The Contender
Tess Lynch: Jeff Bridges is really serious about food: childhood hunger, animal style everything, beans (allegedly), and of course, shark steak sandwiches. I like a president who orders confidently, risking mercury poisoning and national Muenster shortages — who knows what he wants and isn't daunted by a challenge. Thinking fast, inspiring entree envy, throwing something crazy on rye: That's a leader.
Last night at New York University, for 80 straight minutes, without assistance, an intermission, or even a pause, rapper/author/producer/director/historical online figure human being Lil B gave a lecture.
It's impossible to truly explain what it was like to be a part of this event. Thankfully, the good people at The FADER have blessed the Internet with a full transcript, there is a full audio recording on Soundcloud, and there are some great quotes and video clips at Pitchfork, just to fully round out all of the non-taste-and-smell sense experiences.
Feeling the need to do my part, I saw the only missing aspect of the next-day review cycle was a list that categorized all of the points he made, beliefs he shared, and advice he gave. So while I highly suggest treating the full transcript and audio file as a joint experience, if you don't have multiple hours to spare, here is a Lil B Lecture Cheat Sheet to hopefully give you a small sense of what took place.
There used to be a time when I would get e-mails from five to seven people whenever then-Senator Obama made a great speech or did something that helped his charge toward the presidency. I would receive these emails because, in 2007, I was known for being obsessed with Obama. This was a great period in my life, when I was recognized for loving something so positive and important.
Fast-forward five years and pretty much the opposite scenario has taken place. Yesterday, word spread like wildfire among degenerate circles that rapper/author/mogul/online historical figure Lil B the Based God was set to give a lecture at NYU on April 11. I didn't have time to stumble upon this information on my own, because after one long, cell-service-less subway ride, I emerged to the street level to see several texts, Gchats, e-mails, tweets, a voice mail and a Facebook wall post alerting me to this news. So, just to make sure you're clear about the parallel I'm attempting to make, after aging five years I've "evolved" from the Barack Obama Guy to the Lil B the Based God Guy. Good grief, that excites me.
Please, allow this nice gentleman to welcome you to the new Black Keys album. It’s called El Camino, it’s out December 6th, and it is apparently so good it’ll make you want to lease and operate a motel just so you can dance in front of its offices whenever you want.
1. Jay-Z and Kanye West, “Otis”
This, the first "single" from Kanye and Jay’s Watch The Throne (single in quotes because Hov claimed there would be no official single from the album), dropped Wednesday night on Funkmaster Flex’s New York radio show (you should do yourself a favor and listen to Flex’s accompanying rant). The last time Kanye West flipped an Otis Redding sample he made the greatest song of his career (Late Registration's "Gone"). So stakes were high on this one. "Otis" doesn’t quit flip the Stax legend’s "Try A Little Tenderness" as much as it fluffs its hair and puts it front and center. But where the beat is a little underwhelming, the interplay between Jay and Kanye is stellar, as the two trade bars, and use the end of each other’s rhymes as jumping off points for their own. Jay-Z: “I got five passports, I’m never going to jail.” Kanye: “I made Jesus walk, I’m never going to hell.” Don’t sweat the technique.