- Matt Harrison – He gets cryogenically frozen sometimes.
- Derek Holland – His nickname is “Dutch Oven”
- Colby Lewis – He broke a barrier of some kind by being the first player to take paternity leave.
- C.J. Wilson – No longer feuding with Lance Berkman.
- Mike Napoli – Attempted to resolve his defensive deficiencies by getting a bigger glove.
- Michael Young – I’m pretty sure he rescinded his pre-season trade demands to avoid disappointing this 3-year-old.
- Adrian Beltre – Is a two-time Gold Glove winner.
- Elvis Andrus – Said of Derek Holland’s mustache, “It is ugly and the worst ever.”
- Endy Chavez – Has a brother named Ender Chavez.
- Josh Hamilton – Has “Hambone” tattooed on his left arm.
- Nelson Cruz – He got his nickname, “Boom Stick” from a video game ad.
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