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WHY DO YOU KEEP HITTING YOURSELF?

Heat-Pacers Trash Talk Power Rankings

By Chris Ryan on
Al Diaz/Miami Herald/MCT/Getty Images

Miami coach Erik Spoelstra, just hours before tip-off for Heat-Pacers Game 6, This Time It's Personal: "In nine games now there's been over a dozen hard fouls to the face, some of the tomahawk variety, some have drawn blood …"

bulls1

Tomahawk, huh? Spoelstra jumps right into the Official Heat-Pacers What Did He Just Say? Power Rankings. Glad you asked:

1. "I can’t believe my team went soft. S-O-F-T."

Larry Bird

This is astronaut status. Nobody is topping this. Maybe if Lance Stephenson gets David Mamet to write him a profanity-laced monologue that he delivers while wearing the Russell Westbrook for Kohl's fashion line. Maybe then. Probably not.

2. "We're not in here crying about the fouls. They fouled us."

— Dwyane Wade

Stop making sense, Flash.

3. "There was no other statement he was trying to make."

— Spoelstra, on Dexter Pittman's foul.

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4. "We have two guys suspended and basically they have no one suspended."

— LeBron James
Basically.

5. This Tomahawk nonsense.

We'll keep you posted.

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