In case you were out living a life of leisure, here's what you missed in sports on Thursday.

• On a night when Kobe Bryant was hampered with a stomach issue, Ty Lawson scored 32 points and the Nuggets forced a Game 7 with a 113-96 win over the Lakers. "It sucks when you're sick for a big playoff game, doesn't it?" said Michael Jordan, in a really sarcastic phone call to Bryant. "So hard to play well. So hard to win. Hey, good luck man. Good luck with everything. Jordan out."

In case you were out living a life of leisure, here's what you missed in sports on Tuesday.

• Kobe Bryant scored 38 points and Andrew Bynum contributed 27 points and nine boards as the Lakers took a 2-0 lead on the Nuggets, winning 104-100. In downtown Los Angeles, things turned a bit ugly during the second quarter when suspended forward Metta World Peace was found in a city dumpster viciously elbowing a pile of old chicken nuggets. Eyewitnesses described the act as "almost definitely intentional."

So much amazing is happening, and the Shootaround crew is here to help you keep track of it all. You'll find takes on moments you might've missed from the previous night, along with ones you will remember forever.

'Break in Case of Emergency (But Not With Your Fist) (And Being Down 2-0 Is Not, Technically, an Emergency, FYI)' Moment of the Night

Partially due to frustration and partially due to the too-tight prison-bar cornrows atop his head, after a Game 2 loss Knicks power forward Amar'e Stoudemire punched a glass fire extinguisher door, lacerating his hand. He was later seen leaving the arena in a sling.

C'mon, Amar'e. You can't just go punching glass and think things will be better. We've been over this. It's like you've forgotten what Diddy said about hard times:

"You can’t just choke all your problems away. It takes hard work. If I had my way, I’d never work. I’d just stay home all day, watch Scarface 50 times, eat a turkey sandwich, and have sex all fucking day. Then I’d dress up like a clown, and surprise kids at schools. Then I’d take a dump in the back of a movie theater, and just wait — until somebody sat in it. Hear it squish. That’s funny to me. Then I’d paint, and read, and play violin. I’d climb the mountains, and sing the songs that I like to sing. But I don’t got that kinda time."

You're better than that, Amar'e. —Rembert Browne

In case you were out living a life of leisure, here's what you missed in sports on Monday.

• Dwyane Wade scored 25 points as the Heat took a 2-0 lead on the Knicks with a 104-94 win. After the game, sources report that Amar'e Stoudemire punched the glass casing surrounding a fire extinguisher, suffering lacerations that may keep him out for the rest of the playoffs. The incident reportedly began with the Knicks forward sitting in the locker room muttering crazily to himself: "What stops Heat? To know what stops heat, I must know what makes heat. Heat comes from flames. Flames come from fire. Fire must be extinguished. FIRE MUST BE EXTINGUISHED! AHHHHHHH *sound of shattering glass* AHHHH, MY HAND!" Following the incident, Knicks forward Steve Novak quietly picked up the fire extinguisher, whispered, "He was right — fire must be extinguished," and went off looking for Burnie, the Heat mascot.

In case you were out living a life of leisure, here's what you missed in sports on Thursday.

• Notes kept by Arkansas athletic director Jeff Long during his investigation show that former head coach Bobby Petrino's relationship with his assistant began with a kiss over lunch last fall. "Hi, I'm Bobby Petrino," the coach said immediately afterward. "Thanks for not being weird when I kissed you just now."

In case you were out living a life of leisure, here's what you missed in sports on Wednesday.

• Bill Parcells said he would be a "hypocrite" if he didn't consider the Saints' offer to coach for a year in Sean Payton's absence. He never really explained what he meant by "hypocrite," but most experts agree that it has something to do with his hilarious yet poignant blog IllCoachAnywhere.joomla.com.

In case you were out living a life of leisure, here's what you missed in sports on Monday.

• Tim Tebow was introduced to the New York media on Monday and told them that there is no quarterback controversy between Mark Sanchez and him. "Just like there's no Jesus controversy between Jesus and Mark Sanchez," he said, winking. "But seriously, I do forgive him."

Even during the glory days of Linsanity, when hearts across New York sung with optimism, the return of Carmelo Anthony was regarded with apprehension and fearful shudders. The Knicks are now a slovenly 2-7 since he reentered the starting lineup, and Anthony has assumed a position of popularity that lies somewhere between Joseph Kony and Typhoid Mary. On the Carmelo Anthony Sucks Forum, anonymous posts say things like, “Selfish Ego-maniac. It's all about Me-Melo-and I,” and, “Follow the Melo-BRICK road.” And during introductions before the Knicks' 106-94 loss to the Sixers on Sunday, he was greeted with a smattering of boos.

This is all an abrupt role reversal for a man who was regarded a year ago as the cornerstone of this team. To many fans, it didn’t matter that management disemboweled the roster to pry him away from the Nuggets or that a Baltimore upbringing made his “Brooklyn homecoming” narrative a tad imprecise. Anthony was the man who would lead the Knicks to the Promised Land. For this franchise, the second round of the playoffs would qualify as Xanadu — but so what?

As despair engulfs New York and shrieking for the firing of coach Mike D’Antoni resumes, Anthony has come to represent everything wrong with the Knicks.

The headlines say the Linsanity beat went on Tuesday night. New York’s final two possessions in its 90-87 win over the Raptors — in which Lin tied the game on a driving and-one and won it with a fearless 3-pointer with half a second remaining — will dominate the highlights for the next day or so, and conversations about Lin’s improbable run will accompany them.

The focus will again be on those gaudy final numbers, this time 27 points (for a record total of 136 through five starts) and 11 assists. But for Knicks fans, it should all pale in comparison to the real excitement of Tuesday night’s win. With Lin’s emergence, Amar’e Stoudemire’s return, and Carmelo Anthony still on the way, it was a partial glimpse of a Knicks team they could never have imagined before the season began.

Seasons Of Love

I, for one, can think of nothing more romantic to do this Valentine's Day evening than watch the New York Knicks and Toronto Raptors. Valentine's Day is about love, and love is about communication, and the New York Knicks, for the first time this season, are running an offense in which the players are really, truly speaking to one another with their play.

During the opening few weeks of the season, the Knicks played offense like a bunch of Quaalude addicts looking for an emergency exit in a dark movie theater. They just sort of bumped into each other and knocked over people's popcorn.

Coffee, cigarettes, automobile manufacturing, and NBA trade rumors are what made this nation great. I already had coffee today, I quit smoking a few weeks ago, and I take the subway. So let's just get into the slanderous, scandalous mongering, shall we?

Two juicy ones Monday:

• At the eye of the rumor storm is Danny Ainge. That should come as no surprise to anyone, as Ainge basically sits in the throne room of the Kingdom of Crazytown. Earlier this season he tried to swap Rajon Rondo for a rental of Chris Paul (who was pretty adamant about not wanting to play in Boston). Then, over the weekend, rumors circulated that Ainge was shopping Paul Pierce. You know who buys this one? Paul Pierce. After a 34-point performance against the Wizards on Sunday, Pierce sadly stated, "Well, maybe it's my job to go out there and play like I did (Sunday) and push my value up."
• The other big rumor involves (who else?) Dwight Howard. According to Stephen A. Smith, the Magic have asked the New York Knicks about sending Superman to the Big Apple in return for Amar'e Stoudemire and Tyson Chandler. C'mon, son.

The Magic have just beaten the Knicks, and Dwight Howard’s in a good mood. Most of the Orlando players in MSG’s petite visitors’ locker room are strategically maneuvering orange towels while silently changing; meanwhile, Dwight’s riffing. The first target is Jameer Nelson, who just polished off a postgame Styrofoam platter of wings and fries and now can’t find his shower shoes. Howard offers a hand, ducking his head up to the top shelf of the 6-foot Nelson’s locker: “Oh, you can’t see 'em? Y'all got an apple box?” The assembled media scrum titters, and Howard moves on to one of the refs: “They need to send him to the D-League. He didn’t know what three seconds was. It’s when you’re in the paint for three seconds!” Then he spots ESPN’s news-breaking specialist Chris Broussard and rattles off an impersonation: “I talked to LeBron James … inside sources tell me … I just talked to Jesus and he said …"

"It’s the best defense I’ve seen them play. It’s not anywhere near what I saw from the three games I watched prior. This was a totally different team tonight that we played against than what I saw on tape." — 76ers coach Doug Collins, after Philadelphia’s 85-79 loss to the Knicks on Wednesday

The Knicks’ best defensive effort of this truncated season came Wednesday night against the Sixers, a team that was playing its fifth game in six nights and third straight without its starting center. The Knicks stretched their streak of allowing fewer than 90 points to three games, but it has included opponents such as the Pistons and Bobcats — not exactly world beaters. Still, there are some assurances to be taken in the Knicks’ performance against Philadelphia and the temporarily cooling of Mike D’Antoni’s seemingly eternal hot seat.

Tonight's The Night

For ... Knicks-Sixers!
In Philadelphia, you get your cheesesteaks wiz wit and you get your sports with hate. When you're not hating on Andy Reid, Juan Castillo, Raul Ibanez's peanut brittle frame, Brad Lidge's satanic soul patch, or the ghost of Donovan McNabb, you're hating on the New York Giants, the Atlanta Braves, the Dallas Cowboys, and the New York Mets. It's just how we get down.

Poor Toney Douglas. In the middle of last season, the Knicks were looking to acquire a backup point guard to ensure the diminutive reserve wouldn’t ever have any distribution duties. Six months later, he was asked to orchestrate the offense for a team with championship aspirations. To the surprise of far too many people, Douglas has failed spectacularly in a role he has repeatedly proven unfit to hold. Shocking.