Jalen Rose and Bill Simmons express their excitement about the opportunity to join Magic Johnson and Michael Wilbon on ESPN’s NBA Countdown, and praise the work of Charles Barkley and their other TNT counterparts.
I hate this popular activity because I always end up being dragged to these horrible establishments by ringers who pretend like they aren't good singers, but happen to be fantastic, and who then pretend like they've stumbled on a great song, when they've really been singing the song in question at karaoke parties for years, as well as at multiple high school talent shows and during that four-year a cappella stint.
In case you were out living a life of leisure, here's what you missed in sports on Wednesday.
Since July 11 was the slowest sports night of the year, we hired renowned Dutch digital abstract artist E.V. Emmmph to change things up and make visual representations of each item. Please enjoy it — he was very expensive and very difficult to work with.
So much amazing is happening, and the Shootaround crew is here to help you keep track of it all. You'll find takes on moments you might've missed from the previous night, along with ones you will remember forever.
The NBA Playoffs: Where Inept Happens!
And where are your Chris Bosh jokes now, America? Just one night after the flaming car wreck of offensive ineptitude in Boston, we were presented with something truly ghastly. After a graceless first half, typified by their 24 percent shooting and a desperate turn to Dahntay Jones to spark their game, the Pacers bounced back in the third quarter of Tuesday night's 78-75 win over the Heat. Scoring 28 points — nearly matching their first-half total of 33 — Frank Vogel's crew of crazy kids got everyone involved by evenly spreading shots among their slew of rangy guards and forwards. The Heat? Not so much. The Big Two (RIP this) plus their band of merry scrubs mostly wilted in the harsh glow of a staggering 20-4 run. The Heat scored just 14 points in the third on three field goals. Yikes. Without Bosh rolling from the high post, the Heat's spacing was disastrous, compounding a torrent of errant jump shots. For stretches on Tuesday night, there was little to enjoy, just an endless loop of clanged iron — the two teams finished a combined 4-for-31 from 3-point land. And while LeBron and Wade combined for 52 of their team's 75 points, they were out of sync most of the second half. No other Heat player scored more than five points.