“Who’s up for another three hours of shitty football? Pull up a chair and watch poorly prepared, banged-up football players from two forgettable teams bring out the worst in each other ... it’s Roger Goodell’s Shameless Money Grab, coming up live on the NFL Network!!!!! Hello, everyone, I’m Brad Nessler, along with Mike Mayock, we’re here in Buffalo, and Mike, you’re expecting something truly horrific tonight … ”

Sorry, I couldn’t resist. Tonight’s game isn’t THAT bad — the Bills are laying 2½ points to Miami with their entire season on the line. What needs to happen for the 3-6 Bills to make the playoffs? Well …