So much amazing is happening, and the Shootaround crew is here to help you keep track of it all. You'll find takes on moments you might've missed from the previous night, along with ones you will remember forever.
Maximum Security Award: Dwyane Wade
Watch this. Personally, I've seen a living thing cover as much ground as quickly and aggressively as Dwyane Wade does in closing down Steve Novak, but it was called "Cheetah vs. Warthog" and it was on Animal Planet, not TNT.
In case you were out living a life of leisure, here's what you missed in sports on Monday.
Sources reported that Saints General Manager Mickey Loomis had an electronic device installed in his suite that allowed him to eavesdrop on the headset conversations of opposing coaches. "Listen, I know this looks bad," said Loomis, wearing a wide grin in an attempt to mollify the media, "but the truth is that 10 to 20 percent of the time, I couldn't even relay the plays to Sean in time for us to do anything. So, you know ... chillax, everyone. As my kids say. Non-story. Nothing to see here, move along, as a cop would say. Better get back on this bounty thing, right? That's the real deal. Where there's smoke, there's fire. I won't mention any names, but I've got it on good faith that Gregg Williams put a bounty on sleeping with other player's wives. Wink-wink. Who does that? That's sick, if you ask me. That's front page pornographic material. That's career-making, for a journalist. This electronics stuff belongs in an iPod newsletter, if anything. It's boring, guys. And let's be honest, you're boring enough already. 'Hey, look at me, I'm Dweeby McNewspaper, I play with walkie-talkies because I make no money and wish I was an Army grunt.' Not that I think any of you are dweebs, mind you. And please don't print that about the Army, I love and respect the Army. Big time. Well, don't say 'love,' because, you know, don't ask don't tell and that whole can of worms, but let's just avoid that issue altogether and focus on the heart of the matter, which is that Gregg Williams looks in the windows of other player's wives with binoculars on nights with no moon. Quote that as anonymous, if you would."
