Man, is there a better way to respond to that Tim Thomas White House kerfuffle than holding a giant Obama head behind the net? Nope. There is not.
Thomas was back in D.C. on Monday night, a few months after his now-infamous Facebook post, in which he said that he believed the federal government had "grown out of control." He continued: "Because I believe this, today I exercised my right as a Free Citizen, and did not visit the White House." By now you probably know the rest. Thomas didn't accompany the Bruins to the White House, and missed out on this delightful photo op:
The first star of Sunday's OHL game between the Erie Otters and the Niagara IceDogs was a goaltender who allowed 13 goals on 45 shots in a 13-4 loss.
Of course, he was also wearing skates that were far too small, a jersey that had been hastily assembled just days before, and goalie pads the likes of which he hadn't put on since he was 5 years old. Not to mention that, because of shoulder surgery, he hadn't played in a single game — even at center, his typical position — all season long.
Hockey’s Three Stars of Comedy is a monthly feature that will recognize the three NHL personalities from around the league who produced the most comedic fodder for fans. It will appear at the end of every month (we're close enough this time, right?) unless it hits somebody in the head and gets suspended, at which point it will stay home and sulk.
Honorable Mentions
Corey Perry, Patrick Kane, and Carey Price, All-Stars
For the last few years, the NHL has basically decided that anything goes during the skills competition breakaway event. Props, costumes, special effects — you name it. Each year, that leads to a few players trying to get creative.
Corey Perry's mini-stick and Patrick Kane's Superman routine (with bonus exploding puck encore) both deserve credit for effort, even if Superman didn’t wear glasses and a cape at the same time. But the real star of the show was goaltender Carey Price, who had a bang-on Vesa Toskala impression going right up until he ruined it by making the save.
In case you were out living a life of leisure, here's what you missed in sports on Thursday.
Novak Djokovic advanced to the Australian Open final with a five-set victory over Andy Murray. On Sunday, he'll face Rafael Nadal in a battle of the top two seeds. Meanwhile, Andy Murray remains confident that he'll eventually win a major. "Hey, does anybody know the number of the guy who stabbed Monica Seles right before Graf started dominating?" he asked a room full of reporters. "A friend wanted to know."
At a Joe Paterno tribute, Nike CEO Phil Knight criticized the process by which Paterno was fired. "If there's a villain in this tragedy," he said, "it lies in that investigation and not in Joe Paterno's response." Later in his speech, Knight said that if there's a comic relief character in this tragedy, it's probably Crazy Scott Paterno, the protaganist's son.
No one has faced more shots this year than Cam Ward. In his seventh season with the Carolina Hurricanes, Ward, who writes "Have Fun" on all of his sticks, is adjusting to the new realities of his team, one of which is this: The Hurricanes give up the most shots on goal of all 30 NHL teams. Ward has, unsurprisingly, had a tough season in this environment, and it's beginning to show.
After being beaten in overtime by the Maple Leafs, Ward two-hand Hulk-smashed his stick against the goalpost in frustration. (It was a move he'd clearly had on the mind: One game earlier, against Winnipeg, Ward was yanked for the second time in three games and sat on the bench screaming. "I was absolutely not directing it at anybody," he later said. "I was thinking about smashing the stick but didn't do that. I just started yelling.")
